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Crooked Feelings

by Ali Sperry

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1.
I quit believin’ in all these crooked feelings Other people’s demons that lie through a smile I quit believin’ there’s one good solid reason why it’s considered treason If I won’t fight the war I quit for love I quit for love I quit believin’ that everyone’s deceiving If someone’s out to get me just come and get me now I quit deciding there’s ever truth in hiding Yeah I quit denying all I am anyhow I quit for love I quit for love I quit for love Ain’t no looking back I quit believing it’s noble to be shrinking Or noble to be thinking you’ll keep it to yourself I quit resisting the calling of the mystics There’s something in here missing Dying to come out I quit for love I quit for love I quit for love I’m gonna be alright
2.
Rewind 03:43
Remember in the morning when you'd reach out and pull me to you, oh to you Every touch felt like you meant it Every moment was electric with you, oh with you We can't rewind, falling through time Every day we get further away From the life that we knew at the start Sooner or later we must take a chance And I'm willing to take it if you are When it's quiet in the evening And I wonder if you're thinking of me What do you see No, it's not like the beginning In this life we're not pretending but we Have just what we need We can't rewind, falling through time Every day we get further away From the life that we knew at the start Sooner or later we must take a chance And I'm willing to take it if you are
3.
Another devastation, chaos in the street Wish it was a nightmare, but I am not asleep Scattered on the pavement, innocence again Promise of a future, coming to an end Did it mean anything, anything at all How do we recover, recover, recover Hiding in the silence of sanctuary stone Or looking for an answer In the safety of our home No one is exempt, can we go back to the start What are we afraid of losing, we’ve already fallen apart Doesn’t that mean anything, anything at all How do we recover, recover, recover History stuck on repeat Loss that begs for us to grieve Can’t be frozen in disbelief How do we recover, recover, recover
4.
I waited around, with my hands in my pockets Shuffling boots on the pavement And you, big man in town They said you were hot-headed But I see you're just a big kid Time after time, you said lightning might strike When it's only rain Can't undo the things you have done Such a fool to fall for the tale you spun Cruel expectations Now the curtain comes down It's just me in the shadows All the bright lights have burned out Time after time, I said all the right lines To play the game Can't undo the things you have done Such a fool to fall for the tale you spun Cruel expectations
5.
When I see you in the morning and you're dragging out of bed the way you're looking at me I flash back in my head Way back in the beginning Had no idea I was alone I didn't know I was divided Or that I hadn't found my home They'll say the moment when I found you I found the other half of me That we were never really strangers When they write our biography In the early pages They'll tel the story well I'll see you in the cafe and introduce myself They'll say the moment when I found you I found the other half of me That we were never really strangers When they write our biography And woven through the chapters Will be the thread as it unwinds That we will hold to through the darkness Leaving our loneliness behind So come back in here beside me Another day is done Dream of all our favorite memories And stories still to come They'll say the moment when I found you I found the other half of me That we were never really strangers When they write our biography That we were never really strangers When they write our biography
6.
Look At Me 04:11
A million distractions What was that you said I’m dancing alone here I'm standing on my head Look at me Look at me Am I talking to myself Pay attention to what I’m selling you You don’t want nothing else I wanna impress ya I wanna make you proud But the message must be hazy Cause you can’t make it out Look at me Look at me Am I talking to myself Pay attention to what I’m doing here I don’t want nothing else There’s nothing like you Nothing I can see And there’s no one who loves you Half as much as me Look at me Look at me Am I talking to myself Pay attention to what I’m telling you I don’t want nothing else Look at me Look at me Am I talking to myself Pay attention to what I’m saying here I don’t want nothing else
7.
Ol' Will 03:57
Off the Pacific Coast Highway Where the sea meets the skyway you can find him there Down a sandy little road In a blue mobile home with a hammock in the yard What are you doing today, Will Oh, just more of the same Oh Will, you know he'll Be up in the mountains near Topanga Canyon Got his tools and his dog but he's lost his companion Will he or won't he find a fine lady Got an aching space to fill The lonely summer of ol' Will So he'll pack up his tools Take a seat on the stoop of the house he made for them And the sun slowly sets And the record spins Playing After the Gold Rush again What are you doing tonight, Will Oh, I don't know I just might Oh Will, you know he'll Be up in the mountains near Topanga Canyon Got his board and his bike but he's lost his companion Will he or won't he find a fine lady Got an aching space to fill The lonely summer of ol' Will Oh, listen to the sea When you're hurting she'll sing you to sleep A new day brings a new start So take heart Oh Will, you know he'll Be up in the mountains near Topanga Canyon Got his tools and his dog but he's lost his companion Will he or won't he find a fine lady You know he always will The lonely summer of ol' Will, the lonely summer of ol' Will
8.
Wisteria 03:39
Wisteria, showing off it's new perfume Climbing up the window ledge into your room In your dream, you're lying in your old backyard Searching for another world, somewhere in the stars Ooooh Someone calls, switched on the back porch light Grab your jar of fireflies and go back inside The house is warm, everybody says goodnight Settle down into your bed and close your eyes Ooooh In your dream, looking back on everything Swaying with your oldest friend on the front porch swing It's quiet now, you've said all that there is to say Just breathe in the evening air and drift away Ooooh
9.
The land was forgotten like a whisper in the wind Swallowed by ivy, by the creepers and weeds Where headstones have crumbled under blankets of moss Names forsakes and lost They came here as farmers, masons and maids Worked through the seasons in the sweat and the rain But the fruits of their labor were never their own All for another man's home Over their bones, over their bones Long passed over like a river stone Over their bones, willows weep, a lonesome moon Is left to grieve I walk in the forest, brush the webs form my face And fall through the pages of my history, my name I can tell you the face on the dollars and dimes But I can't trace my family line Over their bones, over their bones Long passed over like a river stone Over their bones, willows weep, a lonesome moon Is left to grieve With greatest care one man tended the grounds Knew the map and he passed it down What would he think, what would he say Since the days a dollar bought a grave Over their bones, over their bones Long passed over like a river stone Over their bones, willows weep, a lonesome moon Is left to grieve
10.
Highest Hill 03:43
I am leaving on a journey today Packing up this soul in this skin There are things I've been meaning to change I don't think I can without going And I will climb, climb, climb the highest hill 'Til I'm face to face with the sun My eyes will see their burning reflection Oh, I'm coming undone Leave a trail of sorrow and shame And all of the hurts I've held onto They are much to heavy a weight To take all the places I want to And I will climb, climb, climb the highest hill 'Til I'm face to face with the sun My eyes will see their burning reflection Oh, I'm coming undone And when I come back down I'll be the girl you loved and more My feet meet the ground More certain than ever before And I will climb, climb, climb the highest hill 'Til I'm face to face with the sun My eyes will see their burning reflection Oh, I'm coming undone So I'm leaving on a journey today Taking all of these memories and years There are things I've been meaning to say In a voice unshackled by fears

credits

released February 24, 2017

Produced by Jon Estes and Jamie Dick*
Recorded and Mixed by Jon Estes
Mastered by John Baldwin
*Except “Highest Hill” produced, recorded and mixed by Joe Pisapia, mastered by Vinnie Alibrandi
Photography: Mick Leonardi
Album Layout: Jeremy Fetzer

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Ali Sperry Nashville, Tennessee

Ali Sperry, when faced with a year of trauma, racial reckoning, and downright worldwide existential crisis, did what she has always done-turned inward and wrote songs that channeled, mirrored and ultimately DISTILLED those cultural currents…
In Front Of Us will be released march 11, 2022, a record that should quietly find its way into a lot of needy hearts.
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